Emotional Regulation Tool #2

The Gentle Shake-Out

Image by linktr.ee/wolfartbrazil

This month’s Therapy Treasure is for those who have a tendency to low mood during the winter.  It can also be useful for burnt-out and shut-down due to long-term stress.

Great for:  feeling low, shut-down, numb, depressed

This tool works by supporting gentle regulation of your nervous system.  Although shutting-down and numbing-out protects us from the damaging effects of too much cortisol and the discomfort of anxiety and overwhelming feelings, it can leave us feeling depressed, numbed-out, low and lacking in our vital energy.  

The remedy for shut-down is to bring some gentle energy back into the system in a way that feels good and satisfying, whilst avoiding over-stimulation which can stimulate more shut-down.

How to do it

Put on some music that you find relaxing, but also has a bit of a beat to it.  Then plant your feet flat on the floor, hip width apart, and begin to shake from your pelvis.

The aim is to move just enough to feel good, but not so much that it feels harsh.  See if you can get all the flesh on the lower part of your body – hips, thighs, tummy, bottom – moving rhythmically in a way that feels satisfying, with as little movement as possible. Don’t worry what you look like – put your attention into how it FEELS….

The Sweet Spot

Our nervous systems love repetitive movement – we tend to find it physiologically soothing – so this is what you are aiming for…  To find the sweet spot in your body and match it with the right movement so it feels really GOOD!

Image by Cleyton Ewerton

I recommend going gently and quietly, rather than shaking like a mad-thing.  You need to be able to really FEEL into what feels good to find the sweet spot where you are listening to your body and giving your system what it needs.  If you shake too hard, you will miss the ‘still small quiet voice’ within your body.  Ideally, you are aiming to let go of your mind and let your body take over.   

You might find that you start shaking one part, and then you get the urge to change the movement and shake from another part, say your chest or your belly, rather than your hips.  Or once you get going you might have the urge to get a bit more vigorous in your movements. Follow those urges…. They are your North Star in this practice.  They are your system asking for what it needs.

Feelings

As you shake, you should begin to feel parts letting go and waking up.  Maybe your insides will uncurl, your breath deepen… Maybe feeling will come back into parts that were numb.

Emotions may surface.  If they do, make sure you keep on breathing! This will help the energy of the feelings to move on through.  Cry if you need to, make noises, shout, or even laugh!  All of this is the ‘stuckness’ dissolving and an important part of you getting yourself moving and vital again.

Contraindications

If you have experience of trauma, sometimes this practice can put you in touch with some of that trauma energy that is held within the body. 

If you feel shaky, dizzy or light-headed:  stop, place your hands against a wall and push hard into the wall.   Breathe OUT in long slow breaths, so your out-breath is longer than the in-breath.  Stamp your feet and continue to push against the wall, until you feel yourself coming back into your body. 

You can then come back to the practice and try again.  But if you find the practice continues to stimulate this response, then I would recommend getting some support from a practitioner who specialises in trauma.

Getting through the winter

So, there you have it… The Gentle Shake-Out.  My suggestion is to incorporate this practice into your days through the winter.  Little and often is good, maybe 10-15 minutes at a time. Even just 5 minutes can be beneficial.  Longer sessions of 30 mins to an hour can give a deeper dive and support some lasting physiological changes. 

My hope is that you’ll find your vitality gently returning to you, bit by bit, practice by practice, carrying you through the winter, ready and energised when Spring finally comes around again. 

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And, if you are like me and you tend to read these kind of things but not get round to doing them, can I give you a little nudge to try it just for 5 minutes and see? You never know what might shift for you….

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As always, if you have any questions, please do get in touch.

Wishing you all a blessed and beautiful second half of the winter, and 2022 to come.

Warmly,

Miche

P.S. If you have found this useful, and haven’t already, you might like to sign up for my monthly newsletter here

Emotional Regulation Tool #1

 

Image by Max Van Den Oetelaar

 

Tighten the scarf so you feel the pressure of it around you

THE HOLDING SELF-HUG

At the moment, I’m passionate about what I call “Nervous System Hacks”!  These are simple practices that enable us to ‘hack into’ our reflexive (unconscious) nervous system functioning to manage our emotional state.  

Consistent with the theme of being “held” in the warm, dark womb-space running up to Solstice this December, here is a simple one which I call the Holding Self-Hug. 

Great for: anxiety, overwhelm, stress, panic, distress, feeling triggered

How to do the Holding Self-Hug

Grab a wide scarf, shawl or small blanket.  Put it round your shoulders and pull it tight in front of you.  Then twist the ends you are holding in front into a knot, so that the scarf tightens firmly around your shoulders.  And then sit for a while.  You can be watching TV, listening to music or talking to someone, or whatever feels good to you, as long as you keep the pressure up.

What effect should it have?

Over time, you should begin to notice yourself calming down, your breathing regulating, your heart rate slowing and feel like you are beginning to come to rest.  And hopefully, you will feel safe again.

How does it work?

We all have neuroceptors that respond to the sensation of pressure on our bodies.  When they detect pressure, they signal the message of ‘SAFETY’ back to the nervous system which then switches off the fight or flight response.  Our nervous system begins to regulate and we feel more settled.

Neuroceptors are why children seek safety in their parents’ laps, why it feels good to snuggle with an animal, why babies that are not held can ‘fail to thrive’, and why weighted blankets are great for those with sensitive nervous systems.

So please do give it a go and see if it works for you, and let me know if you have any questions. 

Wishing you happy self-hugging!

Miche

P.S. I’ll be sending out a new Therapy Treasure every month in my newsletter. If you haven’t already, you can sign up to receive it here.